found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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