Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
