I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
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