Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
