im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
