That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
a search helicopter?!
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Randomize