There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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