I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
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