Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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