did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
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