I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Do you still have your period?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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