i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize