Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
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