If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
