What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
