I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
