I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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