so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
