I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Shame - the story of my life.
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