..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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