You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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