Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Barsexuality is the new black.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
