oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
