You're a womanizer and a bitch.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
