if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
