i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
