Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
