I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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