You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize