I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
being pregnant is like rehab
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Randomize
