dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Lo siento on account of my penis...
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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