would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
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