Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
