Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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