me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
how do flat chested girls get laid?
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
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