The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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