So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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