she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
