ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Randomize
