wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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