the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
