In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
