like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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