its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
