i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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