Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
