hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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