After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
