she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Randomize
