We need to rekindle our bromance
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
